Ok so, I meant to tell this story, but once again my life got so chaotic and I was busy dealing with idiots defending a lazy youtuber...anywho, this is what happened last weekend!
It started off with us arriving in Shreveport and heading to the boardwalk. We went into a cheesecake bistro and was having a good lunch until I heard a familiar baby screaming! That was when I realized the fucking preacher and his family was watching us outside and I ran out and told the preacher to fuck off! While I kept swearing and yelling at the preacher, this random couple comes up to us and asks me wtf my problem is. I told them I have no problem whatsoever and they said that I am swearing like a sailor and there is a shit load of kids all around us! I got cranked up and started telling the male to piss the fuck off and that was when the landlord started stating "Oh shi-, there he goes again, he got his Irish blood pumping again!" Eventually, the police showed up and booted us out...BUT NOT THE COUPLE THAT STARTED IT!!! So we got the boot from the boardwalk that day...great start...
Next, we decided to get a room at Sam's Town (which was being shitty that day) and decided to kill some time at the casino (btw, not a gambling fan). While my doctor was at a blackjack table with my friend, I went to the slot machines nearby and started playing on them. Eventually, I won a good bit of money, but then the damn thing took my money! I was so drunk and pissed off, that I started banging on the machine, breaking it in the process and causing the security to throw me out! Great, another place giving me the boot...assholes!
So, to vent off some steam, I went to a nearby hustler's club to get myself wasted and have a good time! On my way there, I came across a homeless fuck who looks like Marx, the founder of communism, wearing a BIG green trench coat. He asked if I wanted to buy some pills for 10 bucks a pill! So I bought a couple and popped them into my mouth before I went on my way! I then went into the hustler's club and got myself a seat right next to a stripper pole! I sat there getting drunk off booze till this tall, brunette amazon came out and started stripping! I got a bit hard and decided to pay her for a quick lap dance! While we were back there, the dope started to kick in and I started to hallucinate shit! Starting with the skank biting my neck (which was real btw, have a hicky on my neck from it) and making me see my own blood spew out (which was really a hallucination) and causing me to panic! I then looked at the hoe and she looked like she grew fangs, so I went apeshit and thought "Time to go Belmont!" and decided to attack the hoe thinking she was a vampire! Eventually, a buff bouncer grabs me and throws me out, but in the process I saw more of my body scratched up and spewing out blood, making me run around screaming my head off in the parking lot! I eventually started calling up preachers that I would normally harassed and asked for a "last rites" because I thought I was going to die! Then I asked another preacher to bring stakes and some holy water to take out the vampires in the hustler's club! Eventually, a cop pulls up right next to me while I was still panicking! Let me tell you, normally I hate female cops, but this one was SMOKING HOT! I told her to call an ambulance and a preacher to come out here and what does she do? SHE HANDCUFFS ME AND THROWS ME INTO THE BACK OF THE CAR! The landlord eventually comes out there and tells me "I'm going to beat you within an inch of your life!" Before the cop pulled off and hauled me to jail!
At the jailhouse, I kept requesting a doctor and a preacher, but they told me I was fine and I was not bleeding! I told them they were crazy and they threw me into a cell! Eventually I told them all that happened and they told me I was hallucinating everything and once again, I told them they are crazy before going back to my cell! Let me tell you, THIS WAS A SHITTY CELL! The blanket was PAPER THIN and the pillow was TINY AS FUCK! But somehow, someway, I managed to fall asleep on my cot shortly after the police interview.
Eventually, a cop woke me up and I found myself sleeping in a pile of my own vomit. I washed myself off a little and went into the visitor's room, noticing it was Rouge, stating something along the lines of "Why was I not surprised you would get into trouble at a hustler's club!?!" That ticked me off big time and I started telling her everything that happened that day and told her she was a stupid bitch! She then told me she was going to bail me out under the condition that I join a Bible study class her brother is teacher and begrudgingly, I did. So, she bailed me out and took me back to my room where everyone was eating breakfast WITHOUT ME! Eventually, I told them about what Rouge did and the landlord once again gets pissed off about me being in jail!
So once again Shreveport, thanks again for annihilating your last chance of making me happy, YOUR JUST A SHITTY CITY NOW AND I WILL JUST PARTY IN NEW ORLEANS NOW FUCKERS!!!
It started off with us arriving in Shreveport and heading to the boardwalk. We went into a cheesecake bistro and was having a good lunch until I heard a familiar baby screaming! That was when I realized the fucking preacher and his family was watching us outside and I ran out and told the preacher to fuck off! While I kept swearing and yelling at the preacher, this random couple comes up to us and asks me wtf my problem is. I told them I have no problem whatsoever and they said that I am swearing like a sailor and there is a shit load of kids all around us! I got cranked up and started telling the male to piss the fuck off and that was when the landlord started stating "Oh shi-, there he goes again, he got his Irish blood pumping again!" Eventually, the police showed up and booted us out...BUT NOT THE COUPLE THAT STARTED IT!!! So we got the boot from the boardwalk that day...great start...
Next, we decided to get a room at Sam's Town (which was being shitty that day) and decided to kill some time at the casino (btw, not a gambling fan). While my doctor was at a blackjack table with my friend, I went to the slot machines nearby and started playing on them. Eventually, I won a good bit of money, but then the damn thing took my money! I was so drunk and pissed off, that I started banging on the machine, breaking it in the process and causing the security to throw me out! Great, another place giving me the boot...assholes!
So, to vent off some steam, I went to a nearby hustler's club to get myself wasted and have a good time! On my way there, I came across a homeless fuck who looks like Marx, the founder of communism, wearing a BIG green trench coat. He asked if I wanted to buy some pills for 10 bucks a pill! So I bought a couple and popped them into my mouth before I went on my way! I then went into the hustler's club and got myself a seat right next to a stripper pole! I sat there getting drunk off booze till this tall, brunette amazon came out and started stripping! I got a bit hard and decided to pay her for a quick lap dance! While we were back there, the dope started to kick in and I started to hallucinate shit! Starting with the skank biting my neck (which was real btw, have a hicky on my neck from it) and making me see my own blood spew out (which was really a hallucination) and causing me to panic! I then looked at the hoe and she looked like she grew fangs, so I went apeshit and thought "Time to go Belmont!" and decided to attack the hoe thinking she was a vampire! Eventually, a buff bouncer grabs me and throws me out, but in the process I saw more of my body scratched up and spewing out blood, making me run around screaming my head off in the parking lot! I eventually started calling up preachers that I would normally harassed and asked for a "last rites" because I thought I was going to die! Then I asked another preacher to bring stakes and some holy water to take out the vampires in the hustler's club! Eventually, a cop pulls up right next to me while I was still panicking! Let me tell you, normally I hate female cops, but this one was SMOKING HOT! I told her to call an ambulance and a preacher to come out here and what does she do? SHE HANDCUFFS ME AND THROWS ME INTO THE BACK OF THE CAR! The landlord eventually comes out there and tells me "I'm going to beat you within an inch of your life!" Before the cop pulled off and hauled me to jail!
At the jailhouse, I kept requesting a doctor and a preacher, but they told me I was fine and I was not bleeding! I told them they were crazy and they threw me into a cell! Eventually I told them all that happened and they told me I was hallucinating everything and once again, I told them they are crazy before going back to my cell! Let me tell you, THIS WAS A SHITTY CELL! The blanket was PAPER THIN and the pillow was TINY AS FUCK! But somehow, someway, I managed to fall asleep on my cot shortly after the police interview.
Eventually, a cop woke me up and I found myself sleeping in a pile of my own vomit. I washed myself off a little and went into the visitor's room, noticing it was Rouge, stating something along the lines of "Why was I not surprised you would get into trouble at a hustler's club!?!" That ticked me off big time and I started telling her everything that happened that day and told her she was a stupid bitch! She then told me she was going to bail me out under the condition that I join a Bible study class her brother is teacher and begrudgingly, I did. So, she bailed me out and took me back to my room where everyone was eating breakfast WITHOUT ME! Eventually, I told them about what Rouge did and the landlord once again gets pissed off about me being in jail!
So once again Shreveport, thanks again for annihilating your last chance of making me happy, YOUR JUST A SHITTY CITY NOW AND I WILL JUST PARTY IN NEW ORLEANS NOW FUCKERS!!!
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